How to Manage Back to School Stress – a Dad’s Survival Guide
This is my first Back to School season as my oldest enters Kindergarten this fall. It is an unprecedented season filled with extra stress due to the COVID pandemic. As I researched how to have a “successful Back to School season,” I found great DIY tips for projects and packing lunches, but did not see a lot about helping parents get through this stressful time. So here’s my take on how to manage Back to School stress.
- Understand what’s causing the stress. COVID impacted schedules, attending a new school, and back to school shopping are just a few stressors impacting parents. Tackle your largest contributor first. The largest for my family is the impact of different Back to School models at schools (hybrid, at-home, &/or full time in-class learning). This stress was driven by uncertainty; which model will it be? To survive the uncertainty we moved to #2…
- Control what you can, manage what you can’t. This is a mantra quoted in my about me in the context of having multiple young kids. It means plan what you can plan for, execute it and move on without dwelling on what you can’t control. Easier said than done, I get it and struggle too. While we could not control the school’s model decision, we could make a plan and research care options, including finding other schools planning to go back full time. Once we knew the model were ready to execute our plan for schooling/care and tackle other challenges like shopping.
- Know how you work – My wife and I work differently. I work in tasks while my wife is more strategic and big thinking. She always thinks 10 steps ahead of me and sometimes I struggle to keep up. But, I recognize this and talk to her about what needs to get done. Be aware of your style to be most effective; are you the rock in your relationship or the balloon? An analogy I heard on MyTalk said by some celebrity. Sorry, don’t know details. Just know who you are and how you work so you can get through the stress in a way that aligns to your style.
- Work how you work – There’s great resources on organization and plenty of new tips/projects you can DIY. But, if you’re not an organization wizard, even the best made DIY planning calendar won’t plan itself. I write down tasks, then review with my wife. She helps me by asking what goal they latter to, then I reevaluate and prioritize based on our goals. This is a lot harder than it sounds, I have yet to master, but I’m practicing and evolving. Also, I like to recognize what got done too. This can be as simple as briefly reflecting on checked tasks or more advanced methods like monthly goal/achievement checks. There’s a feeling of accomplishment when you recognize achievements vs getting caught up in an endlessly growing to-do list.
- Partner to get through – Commercials say, “we’re in this together.” OK great, but you need a support system not a slogan. My wife, parents, and in-laws are mine. Use yours, especially if you don’t have a partner to help, seek a friend or family. Ask for help if you need it, people are generally supportive. For example, my parents are busy too, but not so busy that they are managing full-time careers while juggling five kids under five. They help watch our kids while we go shopping or on date nights which is a LIFE SAVER! If you don’t have this luxury, checkout care.com or nextdoor for sitters. Use your support network, text, email or zoom with friends. It’s work, but it’s healthy to maintain relationships and check on others or get support from them back to keep you stable. If you don’t have emotional support, here are apps and resources to help manage stress. This is a much deeper topic to explore later.
Helpful Resources
Spanning COVID Education, planning tips/apps, and general stress management, here is a consolidated list of resources to help get you through Back to School SZN and beyond.
- CDC Parent Checklist – COVID-19 focused Back to School planning checklist to guide parents.
- U.S. Department of Education – Lots of great resources for everything school related, not just Back to School season. From a monthly success guide to great tools to help throughout the year, this is a great year-round resource.
- Especially useful is tips to Help your kindergartners learn to read and steps to helping your child with homework.
- MN Department of Education COVID-19 – For Minnesotans, this is the COVID-19 Education spot.
- Parents.com Back to School – Routine is the top priority for success plus other resources, mainly meal/planning focused.
- 20 Free Back-to-School Apps for Parents plus this bonus gem, a Parent’s guide to TikTok dances
- 15 DIY Ways to Get Organized for Back-to-School Season – From The Spruce, written by Lauren Thomann, I especially like the command calendar.
- KidsHealth: Going Back to School – good tips for first day success.
- Helping Kindergartners Learn to Read – Booklet from the National Institute for Literacy to help parents help kids read.
- WebMD: Ten Tips to Manage Stress – General stress management tips.
- Why I’m Not Sending My Kids Back to School from Coronavirus: Fact vs Fiction on Apple Podcasts. Dr Sanjay Gupta’s take on not sending his high school aged kids to school in Georgia. Good overview of some of the metrics you should consider to inform your decision.
Unscientific poll of @FullDadMode Instagram followers.
When asked, “what is your #1 resource to survive back to school szn,” Dad Moders responded with a refreshing response, cocktails.
So if you my Back To School advice flops harder than my TikTok videos, just grab a cold one and ride out the szn…cheers!
This is my first “BTS” experience with a daughter entering kindergarten. So, I’m no expert. As I explored what it means to go back to school successfully, I realized I’m just trying to get by like everyone else. It was therapeutic writing this post, reflecting on life’s current situation and how I’m working through it. It increased my awareness and makes me want to improve and practice what I’m preaching. Enough about me though, good luck with your own experience and message me if you have recommendations for survival this fall.
Thanks,
Britt
About Post Author
Britt
Hey I’m Britt. I run Full Dad Mode to help people like you make the most of life. I share helpful DIY how to's and recipes designed to make busy lives easier. Click here to sign up for email updates to stay up to date on the latest tips and from Full Dad Mode!
